a not so merry unbirthday (blc post)

so because gus is SIX MONTHS OLD — TODAY!!!! — we were going to get his 6 mo photo taken at the very professional target photo studio. and because gus’ mama is a dunce, we looked up the closest target (because we have coupons! we are coupon people now!) with a photo CENTER not a photo STUDIO. so we went to our usual target and, duh, no picture-taking there. dumb dumb dumb. but no problem. we just came home and planned to go after gus’ second nap. and since today is gus’ big day, we decided to extra super fun things! like blow bubbles! INTO MY BABY’S EYE! and so now, even though i have THE MOST laid back baby ever, who never EVER complains about anything, we can’t get gus’ picture taken because the entire right side of his face is a huge splotchy red mess. and jeremy and i were talking this morning about who will watch gus on monday while i go into for this interview and i was saying i dont’ want to leave him with a stranger and I CAN’T EVEN BE RESPONSIBLE MYSELF. god. i flushed it with water once, and then remembered my street fighting skills and flushed it twice with eyewash from back in the day. he did not love that, let me tell you. i am not even sure if i did it enough. i tried to pop a bubble in my own eye, so see just how much gets in there, but ohmygod, do you know how hard it is to try to pop a bubble in your eye?? not just because your eye gets all OHMYGODTHERESABUBBLECOMINGFORME!! but also because the damn things pop so friggin quickly. i finally DID get one to pop and it didn’t seem like so much, but then again, i am THREE DECADES older than my son, so i still am not that great of a test subject. he is sleeping now, so either the yummy breastmilk he had before his nap is kicking ass and taking names, or he’s going blind while i’m sitting here making jokes about the whole thing and i’m going to have to hang myself for disfiguring and handicapping my son on his half birthday.

here is some of the evidence, so that when gus refers back to THE DAY MY MOTHER TRIED TO BLIND ME and no one believes him because i am such a charming and doting mother, he will have digital proof:

with mamas like these, eh bugga?


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